February 9, 2009

Stimulust . . . and Windfall Prophets

"The first part of my plan is a $1,000 emergency energy rebate . . . I am proposing that we pay for this rebate by taxing the windfall profits of oil companies . . ." – Barack Obama, August 1, 2008.

On the date the Yes-We-Candidate proposed his Emergency Economic Plan, the price of oil stood at $125.10 a barrel, having swan-dived $22 in just 21 short days.

And yes, the earnings for that particular quarter of Exxon Mobil, for example, rose by nearly $4 billion – a hefty 42 percent. But a funny thing happened on the way to our Emergency Energy Rebates: The giant’s fourth-quarter income dropped some – oops – $4 billion.

Meanwhile, prices are now bumping along at around $40 a barrel. Gone with the Windfall, one might say.

But never fear. For a real bonanza, look no further than the Greatest Snow(job) on Earth – the stimulus package brought to you by the Sun King, High Priestess Nancy Pelosi, and l'eminent grise Harry Reid.

Profits up four billion smackers? Amateurs. Barack I and his Court will drop 25 times that before this year’s out, and before they really get warmed up. The original House bill’s added beneficence will leap to nearly $229 billion next year and level out at $160 billion in 2011. 

Budget calculations make my head hurt, but if domestic discretionary (non-entitlement) spending is somewhere north of $500 billion a year, next year’s “stimulus” will increase that number by north of 40 percent. In other words, about the same percentage as the “windfall” in Exxon’s record quarter.

It’s only natural that such a sudden jump in government’s size and influence would give one pause, especially if one is a Republican. But for le Roi Soleil and his cohort, the only natural response to the economic crisis is a stimulust for power – a desire matched only by their impatience with the formalities of the legislative process.

When GOP members voted as one in the House to protest the Obamulus bill’s size and composition, and questioning grew louder on both sides of the aisle in the Senate, The One got a little testy. Opposition? Off with their heads!

“Don’t come to the table with the same tired arguments and worn ideas that helped to create this crisis,” a clearly irritated leader scolded his tormentors. Tired old arguments and worn ideas, Mr. President? You mean like massive, New Deal-style government intervention? Yo, isn’t that the ghost of Harry Hopkins I hear in the background, whispering, “tax and tax, spend and spend, elect and elect?”

And speaking of elections, the president keeps reminding everyone in sight about the contest he recently won. “The American people,” he intoned Saturday, “were hoping that Congress would begin to confront the great challenges we face. That was, after all, what last November’s election was all about.”

I’m not entirely sure what it was about, but I don’t seem to remember an $800 billion-plus reach for O-mnipotence entering the discussion. Moreover, His Highness should be cautious in appealing to popular opinion, since public support for the government gorge-fest has plummeted even faster than the price tag has risen.

Perhaps that’s why 44 ultimately availed himself of the first refuge of the desperate despot – fear-mongering. Intoned he: “If we don't move swiftly to put this plan in motion, our economic crisis could become a national catastrophe. Millions of Americans will lose their jobs, their homes and their health care.”

To call down a measly eight-tenths of a trillion dollars, The One stoops to becoming the windfall prophet – of doom. How the mighty are crawlin’.