Nathaniel

Shockey

Read Nathaniel's bio and previous columns here

April 1, 2009

It’s a Free Country, So Why Does It Cost Me So Much?

Every week or so, I get a paycheck, or to be more specific, a pay stub, since I use direct deposit. I look it over and see that once again the government has dipped its hands in and taken just enough to pay for national defense, welfare, Social Security and a new $8 billion train into Vegas. They never miss a week. I don’t like seeing the money I just earned already being dispersed by someone other than myself, but I guess that’s just life.

With my remaining funds, I go out and do things like buy potato chips, pay my electric bill and car insurance or go to a movie. These are all relatively important things in life. Unsurprisingly, the government figured out that, by showing up at all of the places where we’ll inevitably be, they can continue to dip their fingers into our earnings. Only this time, instead of simply skimming a tidy percentage directly out of my earnings, they take a meager 8.25 percent of whatever I spend.

Since I’ve already paid my defense bill, welfare for my fellow Americans and a shiny, sleek new $8 billion train into Vegas, my money is, at this point, going toward education, police officers, firemen, my vehicle-license fee, and to the salaries of so many fine California representatives.

As California is continuing to sink into a statewide depression, the income tax is expected to increase, which is in addition to a 1 percent increase of the sales tax. No problem. Responsible people have been paying for the mistakes of the irresponsible for decades now in California. Why stop now?

So now my paycheck has been taxed, my habitual spending has been taxed and April rolls around. This means it’s about time to really start focusing on taxes. So my wife and I strap ourselves down and resolve to finish our taxes before we go do anything else. Hours later, we’re both ready to claw each other’s eyes out and run around naked screaming, “Damn the man! Damn the man! Down with the cursed Machine!” OK, it’s probably not fair to include my wife in that last part.

And would you believe that we owe the government more money? You see, if I wanted to, I could just become an expert on the tax code, which is a mere 50,000 pages long (seriously, look it up), and perhaps I’d not have to worry about any early-spring surprises. I actually have a theory that, if you successfully read the entire tax code and receive a passing grade on a test, you are automatically elected king of the U.S. Obviously no one has ever accomplished this so we still only have a president.

This brings me back to the money I’m now just handing over in bulk to our government because the money I automatically (and involuntarily) gave out of my paycheck and whenever I buy anything was clearly not enough to keep things running smoothly around here. I think it’s this check that goes to giant failing companies – companies that failed to make it on their own, but were deemed “too important to die” by our brilliant representatives.

It has come to my attention that I’m not the only one ready for a new tax code. How odd. I’m not the only one who dislikes seeing the same income get taxed 12 different times until there’s nothing left but a few pennies on every dollar earned.

Do you know why this hasn’t changed yet? Because we haven’t gotten mad enough. It doesn’t have to be like this! It doesn’t! We live in a free society. We live in a free society! Don’t we?

Sometimes, this free society doesn’t feel very free.

© 2009 North Star Writers Group. May not be republished without permission.

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