ABOUT US  • COLUMNISTS   NEWS/EVENTS  FORUM ORDER FORM RATES MANAGEMENT CONTACT

Nathaniel

Shockey

 

 

Read Nathaniel's bio and previous columns here

 

February 18, 2009

Waiting for the Stimulus to Spur My Recovery

 

I’ve been thinking, stewing, whatever, about this $787 billion stimulus plan – taking a look at where the money is going, trying to figure out how it could possibly help more than hurt. After all, it’s our responsibility and our opportunity as Americans to be at least curious about where this newfound money is going. So, if you want to know for yourself where three quarters of a trillion dollars in newfound wealth is going, the text of the bill itself is both available for public viewing and a mere 1,000 pages long.

 

Early reports show that only three people have read the bill in its entirety – the first of whom wrote the bill, the second of whom edited it, the third being some guy in Arkansas who thought it was leaked text of the newest John Grisham novel. I tried, honestly I did, but began to suffer headaches after the third page, which was about halfway through the table of contents. The dedication was nice, which stated:

 

For my niece,

Hope this helps,

Don’t forget to pay it back

 

The plot begins to sag after that.

 

Thankfully, our officials were kind enough to dumb it down for us by setting up a web site, www.recovery.gov, that includes an easy-to-read bubble chart, with big bubbles for areas that got lots of money, and smaller bubbles for areas of our country that got only a little bit of money, such as “other.” It seems that we don’t need to know exactly where $8 billion is going, just that it is going somewhere unspecified.

 

Also included on the site is a link to a two-page download titled “Accountability and Transparency,” reminding us that we are entitled to know where our money is going and how well this plan is working. But I am struggling to understand how it is my money, because I’m pretty sure it was borrowed and I certainly can’t remember approving any sort of loan.

 

On the site, there is also a link that encourages you to “Share your Recovery Story.” I responded by saying:

 

“I have yet to feel anything but when I do, I’ll certainly be the first to let our leaders know, and who’s reading my story anyway? Am I supposed to do anything, or will cash simply be delivered to my mailbox like last time? Am I allowed to pay off debts with the money this time, or should I simply go out and spend it again like I was formerly instructed? Until I hear back, I guess I’ll just wait around for this bill to take effect like everyone else.”

 

I still don’t get how the alleged “richest country in the world,” has to take out loans. I guess that, sometimes, one has to borrow in order to continue leading the lifestyle to which he has become accustomed.

 

Perhaps my favorite part of the site is listed under impact/jobs. There is a map of the U.S., and when the mouse is dragged over any state, the amount of jobs this bill will create or save pops right up. Man, our new leaders really know their economics. In Rhode Island alone, about 12,000 people are going to either find work or keep it because of this bill. Unbelievable. Why didn’t we come up with this idea years ago? And whose idea was this easy-to-read-and-understand map of the U.S.? We should make that person president.

 

All sarcasm aside, doesn’t anyone else find it hard to understand how a couple hundred elected officials have, in two weeks, managed to figure out the recipe for turning around an economy that has taken millions of people and decade upon decade to get where it is today? One would have to be incredibly sure about how to fix our economy before borrowing nearly $1 trillion, on top of our already horrendous, cartoon-like amount of debt. Even if, somehow, we stumbled upon $1 trillion that we didn’t have to pay back, it would be nice to think our officials were taking some caution instead of rushing into a plan and denouncing anyone who opposes its passage as bickerers, as Barack Obama and other Democrats have done repeatedly.

 

Well, now the bill has been passed and signed into law. Congratulations. I can’t wait to see this thing pay for itself, and the interest. And if, somehow, it doesn’t work, remember that it’s just a couple hundred billion bucks. If we all chip in, we’ll pay this thing back in no time.

   

© 2009 North Star Writers Group. May not be republished without permission.

 

Click here to talk to our writers and editors about this column and others in our discussion forum.

 

To e-mail feedback about this column, click here. If you enjoy this writer's work, please contact your local newspapers editors and ask them to carry it.

This is Column # NS157. Request permission to publish here.

Op-Ed Writers
Eric Baerren
Lucia de Vernai
Herman Cain
Dan Calabrese
Bob Franken
Lawrence J. Haas
Paul Ibrahim
David Karki
Llewellyn King
Gregory D. Lee
David B. Livingstone
Bob Maistros
Rachel Marsden
Nathaniel Shockey
Stephen Silver
Candace Talmadge
Jessica Vozel
Jamie Weinstein
 
Cartoons
Brett Noel
Feature Writers
Mike Ball
Bob Batz
Cindy Droog
The Laughing Chef
David J. Pollay
 
Business Writers
D.F. Krause