Bob

Batz

Read Bob's bio and previous columns

May 8, 2009

Bob the Bad: Driving the Speed Limit

OK, OK, I’ll admit it.

I did a bad thing the other day and I want to apologize to anyone I may have offended with my actions.

I did my bad thing on purpose, too, and I did it for more than 30 minutes. Furthermore, I did it without even thinking. I just . . . well . . . did it.

What I did was drive the speed limit on the interstate.

My excuse for choosing my speed were the speed limit signs posted every 10 yards or so alongside the roadway. The signs bore the number 65. Dumb me – I assumed the signs were advising me how fast to go on that particular highway. But, as things turned out, I was apparently wrong.

So there I was, tooling along the fat ribbon of concrete going 65 miles an hour as if I didn’t have a care in the world and paying no attention whatsoever to the 400-or-so other motorists around me who were hell bent on turning the interstate into the Indianapolis Speedway but were thwarted by selfish me.

I set my speed control at 65 and I was off and running. I mean off and driving.

But I was a turtle in a rabbit race as other motorists whizzed by me at 75 and 80 and gave me what appeared to me to be rather dirty looks as they passed.

Dumb Bob, I always thought speed limit signs were posted along highways because that was how fast the people who built those highways thought motorists should travel. But that apparently isn’t true because most of the drivers in America completely ignore speed limit signs.

Some ignore them by going too slow. Many more ignore them by going too fast.

Hey, let’s face it. Americans are in a hurry these days. What I don't know is why.

Maybe the guys have hot dates. Perhaps the women are late for hair appointments, or Tupperware parties.

Wherever they are headed, they are headed there at breakneck speeds totally oblivious to speed limit signs.

What I’m thinking is these are the same people who honk their horns in hospital “quiet” zones, clean out their car trash bags in front of “NO LITTERING” signs and routinely park their cars next to “NO PARKING” warnings.

They also pass other motorists near “NO PASSING” signs and totally ignore red lights.

Go figure.
 

Contact Bob at bbatz@woh.rr.com      

© 2009 North Star Writers Group. May not be republished without permission.

Click here to talk to our writers and editors about this column and others in our discussion forum.

To e-mail feedback about this column, click here. If you enjoy this writer's work, please contact your local newspapers editors and ask them to carry it.

This is Column # BB158. Request permission to publish here.