|  Bob Batz Read Bob's bio and previous columns
April 17, 2009
Good News, You Grumblers!
Here’s one for all those grumps and non-believers who contend
nothing good ever happens in this old world any more.
It’s aimed specifically at all those people who spend their
entire lives with frowns on their faces and chips the size of Texas on their
shoulders. Every day, or so it seems, anyway, they gripe that there’s never
any good news in the newspapers and nothing but gloom and doom on the radio.
Whenever they order a meal at a restaurant they complain about the
quality of the food and the flaws in the service.
If it rains, they gripe. If it snows, they moan.
“Groceries cost too much,” they say.
“Ditto for gasoline, neckties and six-packs of beer,” they complain.
They hate rock music, and holidays – especially Christmas – always get them
down.
Their other dislikes include, but are not limited to, Monday mornings,
politicians, used-car salesmen and most of their neighbors.
You know the people I’m talking about, don’t you? They are
all of those men and women who never stop to smell the roses. Or even look
at the roses.
You name it, they grumble about it.
Summers are too hot, winters too cold, taxes too high,
groceries too expensive and other drivers too rude. If smiles were dollar
bills they’d be in the poor house.
The older they get, the more they complain.
If they are Democrats, they bad-mouth the Republicans. If they are
Republicans, they carp about the Democrats. They wouldn’t know good news if
it bit them on the nose and if they found a cloud with a silver lining
they’d probably try to sell it on EBay.
Well, just when you thought there was no hope, here’s some
good news for all those bad news Americans to chew on for awhile.
Actually, it’s good news and bad news.
I heard the other day that a Florida researcher discovered that fewer people
were bitten by sharks in Florida last year.
That’s the good news.
The bad news is fewer people were bitten by sharks in Florida because, what
with the downturn in the American economy, fewer people could afford to
vacation in Florida last year.
How’s that for a day-brightener?
Contact Bob at bbatz@woh.rr.com
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