Bob

Batz

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December 12, 2008

Listen Up, TV Weather Reporters!

TV weather reporters crack me up.

The first thing that makes me giggle is when a TV weather guy or gal tells viewers what the weather is like today. The problem with that is we all know what the weather is like today because we’ve been out in the weather today.

I might, given my age, forget what the weather was like yesterday, or even the day before that, but my memory is still sharp enough to remember what the weather is like today because early in evening when most weather reporters invade our living rooms for the first time, all I have to do is look out the darned window next to my chair and there’s (ta-da!) THE WEATHER.

The point I’m trying to make to TV weather reporters is if it’s raining, I’ll know it. The same thing is true if it’s snowing, sleeting, windy, calm, sunny or cloudy. I’m no meteorologist, that’s for sure, but I sure can tell gloomy skies from sunshine and hot days from frigid ones.

I’m also turned off by weather reporters who tell me “It was 99 degrees today, making it the hottest day since Aug. 4, 1901 when it was 98 degrees.”

My reaction to that bit of weather-related wisdom is, “Who cares?”

Even if I was alive on Aug. 4, 1901, I’d be too damned old by now to give a hoot what the weather was like that particular day.

And, hey, while I have your attention, weather reporters, let me just say that barometric pressures turn me off, too, as do wind-chill factors.

Speaking of turnoffs, I’ve also learned to switch TV channels when a weather reporter tells me “It’s 58 degrees right now, but it feels like 52 degrees.” C’mon, folks, how the heck do you know how 58, or 52 degrees, feels?

One thing I do give weather reporters credit for is that none of them tell us what the temperature is at the airport any more, which I always thought was a pretty dumb thing to do because, hey, everybody knows nobody lives at the airport.

Before I go, let me leave you with this thought. But please, please, don’t tell anyone else, OK?

I really believe my wife Sally and I have a lot to do with determining what the weather will be like on any given day in our neck of the woods.

I say that because if we want six months of 134-degree temperatures and not a drop of rain, all we have to do is plant our backyard vegetable garden.

By the same token, if we are hoping for rainy skies, all we have to do is schedule a picnic. 

Contact Bob at bbatz@woh.rr.com .

© 2008 North Star Writers Group. May not be republished without permission.

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