March 26,
2007
Share Your
Dreams; Let People Help You
Have you
ever said something like this to yourself? “I have a dream. I want to do
what I love every day. Yet, I don’t know how to get there. I have too
many responsibilities right now. I am too busy. When things slow down,
I’ll figure out what to do.”
Most of us
are affected by this thinking at some point in time. We keep our dreams
locked up inside. We wait for another day.
It’s time
to break this cycle of thinking. Stop limiting yourself. Let other
people help you think about how you can achieve your dreams. Call in
their mind power.
Consider
this. You’re at a party and someone says, “What are you up to?” How
would you respond? Most of the time I hear people fumble through their
answers. They say things like, “Not much. Business is good. Family’s
good. How about you?”
Why waste
time boring yourself and others with answers like these. Skip that
stuff. Let other people share in your passion. Ask for their ideas and
advice. Most people will feel closer to you as a result. And those who
show no interest in your passion are better left alone. There’s no need
to spend much time with people who do not care about what matters to
you.
“People who
report high levels of commitment and involvement in their goals show a
high level of well-being and low distress,” reported psychology
researchers Jari-Erik Nurmi and Katariina Salmela-Aro in a chapter they
wrote in A Life Worth Living by Mihaly and Isabella
Csikszentmihalyi.
Here’s how
I like to respond to the “what are you up to?” question. I say, “I’m
having fun writing my columns and working on a book. I’ve been learning
a ton and meeting lots of fascinating people. You know, I’d love your
thoughts on something.” I open myself to their feedback and give them a
chance to contribute. Then I return the favor and ask them what they are
focusing on. I try to engage them.
Heidi Goff,
former MasterCard Division General Manager, once told me, “Always come
ready with your paperwork to be signed.” Her point was that you should
believe in your work enough that you are ready for someone to sign on
the bottom line at any time.
Goff’s
advice applies to meeting people. You should be ready to share your
passion with others. People may be ready to help you right now.
You must
trust yourself to know that you are committed to your dreams, that you
are sincere in your desire to change your life. Don’t get caught up in
an inner dialogue that questions your commitment to your passion. It
won’t help you to repeat, “I’m not sure if I really want to do this or
not, so I better not say anything.”
You have to
trust that your dreams are real. You have to trust that while you might
not yet have a plan to make your dreams a reality, you will. You believe
in yourself. You have self-trust.
Fernando
Flores and Robert Solomon, in their book Trust, wrote, “The
freedom provided by trust is the freedom to think for oneself and speak
up with one’s ideas. It includes as its consequence (not its cost) the
freedom to be questioned and criticized – and the right to be recognized
and (if deserving) rewarded.”
My mom’s
mom used to say to us, “Don’t hide your light in a bushel basket.” My
grandmother wanted us to get out and connect with people. “Let them know
what you’re doing. Let them know what’s important to you.”
Share your
dreams. Let people help you.
© 2007 David J. Pollay.
Distributed by North Star Writers Group. May not be republished without permission.
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