August 2, 2007

Barack Obama: The Jack Bauer of Weak Internationalists

Meet Barack Obama – the Jack Bauer of weak internationalists. It is always hilarious when a Democrat starts trying to sound tough in order to counter the incontrovertible evidence that he is not.

An item yesterday from the Associated Press announced, in apparent seriousness, “Obama May Send Troops Into Pakistan.”

Really? He may? Where did Obama get troops? Perhaps he found them at that Iowa Whole Foods store he was telling the Iowans about the other day. Like his troops, it doesn’t exist either, but it’s every bit as plausible as the notion Obama is trying to put forth with statements about invading Pakistan.

That would be the notion that Obama, as president, would have something approximating a spine on the international stage.

Obama had to do something. Just last week, he revealed himself to be the rank amateur he is – completely in over his head in foreign-affairs matters – by suggesting that as president he would personally meet with the likes of Kim Jong-Il, Mahmoud Ahmedinejad and whatever is left of Fidel Castro. Say stuff like that, and even Hillary Clinton can look rational by comparison. For the president of the United States to meet with malefactors like these simply elevates them on the world stage, while dragging the president and the nation he leads down to their level.

Now why did you say that, Barack? Now you look like a naïve fool. You’d better say something to fix it.

Invade Pakistan! That’s what I, President Barack Obama, would do! How about that? No one is tougher than me! And if the Pakistani government doesn’t like it, too bad! Bellicose Barack doesn’t stop to ask permission.

Yeah. That’s what Jack Bauer would do. Last season on “24,” Jack stormed the Russian consulate in Los Angeles and cut off a dude’s finger to get him to talk. Maybe Obama could try something like that. Of course, even Jack Bauer waited until the president of Russia gave his blessing, so on the international bellicosity scale, even he can’t hold a candle to Barack the Bully.

If, at this point, you’re rolling on the floor laughing at the thought of Barack Obama trying to sound tough on terrorism, try not to roll into me while you’re down there. I can hardly breathe, I’m laughing so hard. And it’s largely because it reminds me so much of the patron saint of American foreign policy weakness – Jimmy Carter.

It’s 1980. Carter has been sitting idly by for months while Islamist terrorists hold Americans hostage in the U.S. embassy in Tehran. He looks weak because he is weak, and he can’t stand it. So finally, in a desperate attempt to pretend he has a spine, Carter orders a “rescue mission” consisting of a handful of helicopters that end up crashing into each other in the Iranian desert.

You don’t send a wimp to do a man’s job. And you don’t put the command of troops in the hands of a self-absorbed neophyte like Obama.

Why invade Pakistan? Because that’s where bin Laden is! Why, wonders the Boy Bully, don’t we invade this region instead of fighting insurgents in Iraq?

Oh, there might be a few reasons. Here’s one: Pakistan has nuclear weapons, and its present government is weak but friendly to the U.S. and not a threat to use the nukes. Destabilize the Pakistani government to the point it is overthrown by Islamist extremists, and you may just touch off a nuclear war between Pakistan and India, not to mention losing any help we’re now getting from Pakistan with respect to intelligence that helps track Al Qaeda and prevents further terrorist attacks in the U.S.

Here’s another reason: The region Obama pretends he is willing to invade is remote and mountainous. It is ruled by warlords. You think the fighting in Iraq is tough? Send U.S. troops in there, without the backing of the government whose nation you’re invading – a backing we do have in Iraq – you might never see those troops again.

Once everyone can see you’re a wimp and a naïve fool, and you just can’t take it anymore, start flailing away at some target and everyone will see how tough you are. It worked great for Jimmy Carter. He sure proved how tough he was.

At least Obama resorted to such nonsense before the nation made the mistake of actually putting him in office. Scratch one from the list of potential 44^th presidents of the United States.