Roller Coaster Seat and Reveal All
time I went to an IMAX Theatre, I was at Cedar Point Amusement Park, and
the movie depicted what it was like to ride a roller coaster in the
front car. Since then, I’ve been addicted to riding in the front car,
and am one of those freaks who will wait in a line hours longer just to
do it. (Lucky for me, my husband is my “freakquivalent” when it comes to
roller coasters. We consider the wait quality time together.)
Some of the
people watching the very same movie had to leave. They got dizzy. A few
made it out of the theater just in time for that day’s lunch to ruin
some poor sweeperette’s day. (Sweeperettes surely have a much more
politically correct title nowadays - perhaps park cleanliness
we work and live with are a lot like the people in that theatre, and at
the amusement park in general. I know. I decided to work there for a
summer and observe them.
there are the front car enthusiasts – the FCE’s. You need a few FCEs in
your life, because they’re willing to wait quietly for what they want.
Most men wish their girlfriends would be this way about marriage. But I
also risk takers. We don’t really care what’s happening behind us
because we’d rather stare danger in the face. A few of us get fired from
our jobs because we don’t follow protocol, but we bounce back. I got
fired from a restaurant for letting an abandoned, freezing litter of
puppies inside for the night. It wasn’t protocol, but I’m the better
least I’m not a FCAW – Front Car Arm Waver.
crazy. They disobey the rules. They try to touch the track, turn around
at the top of the hill to take pictures, wear hats that’ll fly off and
hit someone in the face, and all the other things Cedar Point forbids.
They probably even line-jumped – cause for removal from the park, you
know! They are reckless. The FCAWs that lurk in your life are probably
bashing you under a pseudonym on Myspace.com.
have IDCs – the “’I don’t care’ which car, just put me in the shortest
line” riders. They come to meetings with their laptops and check email
while you’re talking. They get a lot done on a daily basis. Just beware
– they have trouble living in the moment. They’re probably sending
resumes out to your competitors right now, because the track is always
smoother on another roller coaster.
forget those who bring up the rear – last car riders. LCR’s get a great
perspective, having watched everybody else go before them. Maybe you
were an LCR in speech class – not volunteering because you had to
mentally improve your speech during everyone else’s. Just remember – the
last car of a roller coaster is the most likely to detach from the rest
of the train and end up sliding backwards, surely resulting in death. No
LCR has ever starred in an IMAX movie – or any movie for that matter.
are those who would rather watch the ride. For them, it’s good enough to
know what it’s “almost” like to go through with it. Lucky for you, they
never apply to your company because they don’t have the guts. They don’t
ask you out, but they’ll admire you from afar.
there are those that leave the IMAX theatre puking. The pukers. I am a
puker when it comes to politics. I try to watch it on TV. I try to be an
outstanding citizen. But rhetoric, the likes of the Ann Coulters and the
Michael Moores – they make me puke, and I leave the theater.
you have it. Next time you meet someone during an interview, first date,
at a party, or a business conference, ask about their roller coaster
preferences. Together, we’ll put all the people who make personality
tests out of business. The FCE in me thinks that will be fun!
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