July 12, 2006
Vanity,
Vanity . . . These License Plates are Vanity!
I’ve never seen the need for so-called “vanity” license plates. For one
thing, they cost more. For another thing, they’re silly.
I saw a
couple the other day. One carried the letters “SHHHHH”, which must have
belonged to a librarian. The other, emblazoned with the letters “CUTE
GAL”, didn’t really tell the true story, however, because the woman
behind the wheel was as homely as a picket fence, as my mother used to
say.
Some vanity plates denote the car owner¹s occupation. Others spotlight
his or her hobbies, kid’s names, birthplace, dog’s name, cat’s name,
favorite football, baseball or basketball team, mother’s nickname or
preference in vacation spots.
Why, I wonder, would I pay a premium price for license plates just so I
can tell total strangers, including some who obviously are driving close
enough to me to be cited for tailgating, where I was born or my dog’s
name or my favorite TV show?
Just for the heck of it, I tried to come up with a license plate letter
combination that would fit my personality and lifestyle. Keeping in
mind I have to limit the letters or numbers to seven or less, here are a
few of my ideas:
IN DEBT
OLD GUY
SWL DUDE
SO BROKE
XKID
SUPR
MAN
GRAMPA
BACK OFF
SLOW DN
GN FISHN
I finally gave up and went with my own theory for creating a vanity
plate message. I just take numbers and letters the folks at the
Department of Transportation give me and create my own vanity plate.
This time
around I got GW 435.
“How do you
like my new vanity plate?” I asked a friend.
“Vanity
plate?” he replied, eying the letters.
“Sure,” I
told him. “I got it special. The GW stands for ‘Great Writer.’ Neat,
huh?”
© 2006 North Star Writers
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