North Star Writers Group

When I was a kid, I collected postage stamps and baseball cards that came in packages of bubble gum, but as I grew older both of those pastimes fell by the wayside.

Later, I gave paint-by-number pictures a try but my first, and last, work of art – a paint-by-numbers picture of The Last Supper – was terrible.

So there I was, 50 years later, trying my darndest to find a hobby.

Many possible hobbies came to mind, including furniture refinishing, collecting antique automobiles and sky-diving.

I also toyed with crocheting, collecting beer cans and spelunking, which involves exploring caves, but I quickly ruled out the latter because the last time I looked there weren’t any caves in the town where I live.

I decided to ask my first wife Sally’s advice.

“I’m going to get a hobby, but I’m not sure what kind of hobby I want,” I told her.

“Swell,” she said, stifling a yawn.

“What kind of leisure-time activity do you think I should pursue?” I asked.

She thought for a moment, then replied, “For starters, why don’t you spend your leisure time learning the correct way to fold laundry that’s just out of the dryer? Or, how about learning how to vacuum the living room? The ceiling in the master bedroom needs painting, the garage needs cleaning out and it’s been a month since you mowed the lawn.”

Click here to talk to our writers and editors about this column and others in our discussion forum.

To e-mail feedback about this column, click here. If you enjoy this writer's work, please contact your local newspapers editors and ask them to carry it.

This is Column # BB085. Request permission to publish here.