Dan

Calabrese

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March 27, 2008

How Could Hillary Clinton Be So Stupid? The Question Answers Itself

We have all known people who felt the need to embellish their own lives’ stories, figuring that no one would be all that impressed with the genuine article.

“Would you like to go out with me? What do I do? I work for the police. In fact, I’m the chief of police!”

What Jon Lovitz introduced into pop culture as pathological liar Tommy Flanagan on Saturday Night Live, Hillary Clinton now brings to our presidential politics.

She went to Bosnia and was greeted by a little girl – no, scratch that, was greeted by sniper fire! Yeah, that’s it. And she walked off the plane, no, she ran with her head down to get to the car as fast as she could! Yeah. That’s the ticket.

Fine. So Hillary made up some complete B.S. about coming under sniper fire in Bosnia. That’s no surprise. Hillary has lied about everything from who she was named after to where her billing records were to how she made that cattle futures killing. Hillary Clinton is a liar. We’ve all known that for a very long time.

But this latest incident has raised eyebrows because Hillary is supposed to be so smart.

How could she concoct such a bunch of hogwash about an incident that was also attended by many members of the press and other invited guests? She couldn’t figure out that someone like Sinbad would go public with his very different (in other words, true) recollection of events? She couldn’t figure out that various print reporters who were there would write what they remember?

She couldn’t figure out that someone would have archived news video that shows the greeting ceremony she says didn’t happen – and shows the heads-down-sniper-fire-ducking not happening?

How could she do something so stupid, when we all know she is so smart?

Well, let’s see. Here’s a thought: She’s not smart.

Exactly where did the idea that she is smart come from in the first place? Because she is a lawyer? You think there are no dumb lawyers? Because she got put in charge of health care reform in the most disastrous episode of nepotism in the history of the United States? That was impressive. Because she got elected to the U.S. Senate on the basis of name recognition after the White House strong-armed qualified candidates to get out of the way for her?

Now we hear that she is smart because she has “a command of policy matters.” That’s supposed to be impressive? She’s a United States Senator. What else does she have to do, other than make up stories about her battle exploits?

No smart person would a) attempt to pass off such baloney as truth; b) stick to her story when called out by multiple witnesses; then c) claim she only mis-remembered it just days after telling it in painstaking detail and defying anyone to show she was wrong.

So can we now dispense with the notion that Hillary is smart? She very obviously is nothing of the sort.

But it’s more than that. It’s all about the now-unraveled Hillary mythology, and it proves once and for all that Hillary – perhaps more than anyone – doesn’t believe her own advertising.

She knows she is not all that and a bag of chips. Otherwise, she wouldn’t make up stupid crap about herself. She knows she is not experienced. She knows she is not ready to lead on day one. She knows that if the 3 a.m. phone call comes, her only hope will be to pray that Bill has managed to make it home by then (preferably alone).

Hillary has never accomplished anything except on Bill’s back, and the only way to rectify that is to equal his biggest achievement. And the only way to make herself appear qualified to do so is to lie, because the truth just isn’t all that impressive.

That’s what many people do when they look back over their lives and don’t see much to hang their hats on. They substitute a more intriguing narrative. Heck, maybe Hillary’s played this story so many times in her mind, she actually does believe she came under sniper fire. Maybe Tommy Flanagan really believed he was married to Morgan Fairchild.

But Tommy was entertaining. Hillary is either mentally deluded or the most simultaneously dishonest and stupid woman in America. Either way, she’s wasting our time and diverting our focus from serious people who are trying to make a real case for themselves as candidates for president. And the longer she keeps this up, the more desperate she becomes, and the more embarrassing it all gets.

Maybe some day she will tell stories of her brilliant presidential campaign. Yeah. That’s the ticket.

This is Column # DC162.  Request permission to publish here.