Lucia

de Vernai

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November 26, 2007

Can a Hillary Supporter and a Kucinich Devotee Find True Love?

The classic Capitol Hill forbidden love story (yes, there is one) is changing. The explosive nature of bipartisan relationships pales in comparison to the tempest of same party, different shade of blue (or red). Dating someone from the other side of the spectrum can be rather exciting. The “you’re-wrong-but-no-one-has-made-my-blood pressure-raise-like-this-while-fully-dressed-in-a-long-time” factor can make even a libertarian endearing.

Still, while opposites may attract, in the end most people settle down with like-minded individuals. Or so they think. It’s always around election time that people recognize that Republican and Democrat are very, very vague terms. You learn this sitting on the couch with your significant other watching a debate and right after Rudy Giuliani mentions national security for the 11th time, you look at each other and in that cute way in which you finish each others’ sentences you sigh “It’s incredible how focused he is!”. . . just as your partner exclaims, “It’s incredible how narrow he is!” And so it begins.

Your ideals and values in the abstract can be true blue, yet once they are embodied it turns out that you are a nice deep navy while your partner resembles what J. Crew would call “azure sky.” The two are lovely complements that coexist – until you have to pick one to represent them all.

A house divided cannot stand, and so a subtle guerilla war of “primary colors” begins.

Let me illustrate: Several months ago my dad was very fond of Barack Obama. This weekend he announced his support for Hillary Clinton, mom’s favorite. I didn’t ask for details, but I’m guessing that the couch wasn’t a comfortable place to sleep. To be fair, this rift can be a good opportunity to refine your political tastes and learn about yourself. I didn’t know how close to the dark side I am until I started dating a Dennis Kucinich devotee. 

If this is happening to you too, there are ways to avoid conflict (and the couch) and make the upcoming months of negative peace enjoyable. Most importantly, retain a sense of humor. Yes, it’s of utmost importance and the clock is ticking, but be careful. Eight years of magenta instead of crimson may be less painful than until-death-do-us-part with your offended spouse.

Cheap shots are in order in this case. Go for the “my enemy’s enemy is my friend” approach and instead of focusing on your differences, complain about the opposing side. Politics is depressing and discouraging as is, there is no need to invite that atmosphere into your most precious personal space. With this candidate lineup, there is enough to laugh about. As a college student, I am particularly fond of the very devoted Ron Paul supporters who get very uncomfortable when I ask them what they’ll do once there is no more Pell grant love coming from the feds.

This is also an opportunity to observe your partner’s character. While a relationship between a Hillary and Dennis fan sometimes feels like proof that love conquers all, it all rests on priorities and values that transcend politics. There are those who are not capable of dignified disagreement or civilized criticism, and having a partner who does not respect your choice and judgment is bound to be a story without a happy ending.  

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