Dan

Calabrese

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December 4, 2007

America Weighs In On Jennifer Love Hewitt's Butt

Jennifer Love Hewitt, whoever that is, has apparently put on a few pounds. And if you want to scream to all the world that she is fat, have at it. It’s how we do things in society today.

Ms. Hewitt, 28, was recently photographed in bikini-clad fashion while wading in water that was shallow, but not as shallow as the culture that considers her fair game for ridicule. It didn’t take long for celebrity news web sites like TheSuperficial.com to post the photo along with its own comments – and those it invited from readers – that would send any family member running off in tears if you said them to their face.

Apparently Ms. Hewitt is an actress of some note. I don’t really know what she has starred in, and I don’t really care. But she is clearly part of a subset of American culture of whom physical perfection is expected, and for whom any violation of this expectation will result in abject public humiliation of the worst kind.

I know. I sound like a feminist. But sometimes the feminists are right, especially when they talk about America’s skewed concept of the female body, and the way it makes ordinary young women feel about themselves when a woman they likely consider more attractive than themselves is skewered for being less than ideal.

If you want to see the photo, my syndicate has posted it at http://www.northstarwriters.com/jenniferlovehewitt.jpg. The supposed problem is that her butt is big, although it’s honestly hard to tell because her butt is a) behind her; and b) under the water. The social commentators who consider it their right to pronounce judgment on the appearance of others were taken aback by her curviness. I gather from this that this particular part of her body was previously so flat as to make her resemble a pole.

Whatever she used to look like, what I see in the picture is a normal-looking American female. Attractive, even. And I’m taking a guess here – I have no way of knowing – but I’d wager that the writers taking the shots have butts and bellies they wouldn’t display on their own web sites.

Ms. Hewitt, to her credit, didn’t take this lying down. She struck back at her critics, although she did so in an unnecessarily defensive manner, saying: “What I should be doing is celebrating some of the best days of my life and my engagement to the man of my dreams, instead of having to deal with photographers taking invasive pictures from bad angles.”

That statement was perfect until the last three words. The “from bad angles” qualifier is clearly her way of telling the public that if they had taken the photos from good angles, she would have looked just fine.

But she does look just fine. And even if her butt was twice as big, so what? The worst take on this is that America is so shallow that we can’t handle the fact that someone we see on TV or at the movies is imperfect – like most of us are. That we need to see some idyllic approximation of what we wish we could be, and that if our celebrities don’t meet this standard, we have the right to roast them in a way we could never handle if anyone did it to us.

The more charitable take, and the one I think is closer to the truth, is that this is what the news and entertainment media think you are like. Why do you think CBS put Katie Couric on the Evening News instead of just leaving Bob Scheiffer in that role? Scheiffer is the far more experienced and capable journalist, but CBS thought you wanted to look at famous eye candy. Since Couric took the gig, CBS’s ratings have gone through the floor. Maybe they underestimated you.

I like the political slant of Fox News Channel, but it’s OK if they give me my conservative-slanted news delivered by old men in suits who know what they’re doing. Or old women. Ugly women, even. Not a problem. I don’t need to see bleach blondes with long legs and big boobs who pronounce Spokane like Spo-kain.

Real people have cellulite and big butts. You don’t mock them for it to their faces because you’d ruin your own reputation and hopefully get a black eye and a bloody nose. But when you think no one will ever know it’s you, mock away.

A few months ago, 13-year-old Megan Meier hanged herself because she thought a boy she liked had stopped liking her back. The whole thing was a cruel hoax, but that’s a discussion for another day. I don’t know if Ms. Meier had body-image issues, but I do know that young people are far more emotionally vulnerable than many people realize, and many are desperate for the approval of others. This is not right, but this is the way it is.

When a very attractive, famous actress can be ripped to shreds for the crime of having curves for goodness sake, what do you think that says to the 14-year-old young lady struggling to get down to 200 pounds?

It tells her that she’s a big fat piece of worthless crap, that’s what. And she’s not. But who cares about that when you can take free shots at a famous person over something completely irrelevant? News and entertainment media think this is how you look at others. Please tell me they’re wrong.

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