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August 5, 2009

Change Comes to the Bagelwich! Now Do As You’re Instructed . . .


The only people today not familiar with the basic bagelwich are those who’ve lived somewhere underneath a rock for most of their lives. It has been with us since the 1980s and takes a familiar form. Egg is sandwiched in between two toasted bagels. Usually some form of cheese is involved, as is some kind of breakfast meat – ranging from bacon to sausage patties to even sliced ham.


As with all things, this leads to a natural evolution into something a bit more sophisticated. Most people, for instance, wouldn’t first think of sour cream when they think of breakfast and eggs. Yet, there we are – two decades removed from the original bagelwich where people are starved for change.


The association of sour cream with the bagelwich starts by scrambling the eggs. You do this in a bowl ahead of pouring into a heated skillet. While doing this, add a little bit of minced garlic and also a spoonful or so of sour cream. Why sour cream? Don’t ask a lot of questions. Just do as you’ve been instructed.


Heat some olive oil in a skillet, and begin to toast the bagel halves. The important thing here, at the end of it, will be to retain a good deal of heat at the end of the cooking process. The reason? Do not ask questions. Just do as you’re instructed.


Stir the eggs over the heat as they cook. If you don’t know the process this takes, then stop and back up. You are in a place far too advanced for your skills. Unless you are some kind of cooking savant, your efforts will result in failure.


The bagel will finish toasting about the same time that the eggs are cooked throughout. Lay each bagel half down. Here, you will be tempted to lump on top of each half the cooked scrambled eggs and call it good. Perhaps you will even frost the peak of the mountain – as the poet says – with a slice of cheese. Do not rush things.


Lay down on each bagel half a layer of fresh spinach leaves. Then, add the eggs. The heat of the eggs and bagel will soften the spinach considerably.


This would be a tasteful enough breakfast on its own, but we are not complete. As clichéd as it perhaps sounds, you cannot have a bagelwich without cheese. It just can’t be done. Why? Do not ask questions. Just do as you’re instructed.


Here, however, avoid the clumsiness of cheese slices. You can do better than that. More to the point, this will require a cheese that can accompany not just eggs, but also sour cream and spinach. Sprinkle over the top some shredded Parmesan cheese. If your eggs are warm enough, this will melt a little. Over the top of this, sprinkle some cracked black pepper. If the cheese is the frost on the peak, then the black pepper is the talus. What is talus? Do not ask questions.


© 2009 North Star Writers Group. May not be republished without permission.


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